dreamcatchings | (no subject)

So I come in for the night shift because I said I would and there's no one else to work it despite the fact that my ear is throbbing. I don't think people who've never had an ear infection understand how painful it is. It throbs and buzzes and hums. It keeps me up at night. It wakes me up in the middle of the night. It gives me headaches. It keeps me from hearing correctly. It disorients me so that my movements are even more clumsy than usual.

It hurts.

So I come in.

Everyone notices the hair and teases me about it.

Craig asks, "Will you be in tomorrow?" He has to ask twice because the first time I couldn't hear him.

I tell him I'm not sure about the whole day because of the ear thing. I tell him I was at the doctor's today. He asks if the doctor told me anything. I tell him he told me I have an ear infection. And that when I went to the ER the other night they did nothing.

My problem with this whole scenario is that I am the least likely person to fuck this company over. Dale? Is fucking us over. John? Fucked us over. Rodney? Fucked us over.

I was at the ER from 3:30am until 5:30am Saturday morning and came in to work at 8:30am that day despite having gotten maybe three hours of interrupted sleep. I came in tonight despite the fact that the right side of my head is throbbing.

I don't like the message here. That Dale can not only take off three weeks without telling us, but that he can also take two or three days off during the week when he's sick and not get asked a single fucking question. I take off six and a half hours, and I feel like I'm getting reamed about it.

And why is that? Because I dyed my fucking hair?

That shouldn't fucking matter. I was at the ER. I was at the doctor. I just paid over $60 for medication. This is the third full day I've put up with it, and nobody seems to think it's fucking important or, what, real? Like I'm fucking lying that I can't hear out of my right ear? That I'm fucking lying that it hurts, and I've been running a low grade fever since Saturday? Oh, yeah, I have so much fucking reason to lie about being in pain. I'm starting to wish I had taken that doctor's note. I was all, "No, that's cool" to the nurse because, well, fuck Dale never brings in a note at all.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Honey. You know I love you and I have only your best interests at heart. So believe me when I say you need to take some time out and FUCK THEM OVER. That's how you see it; anyone else would see it as being honest with yourself about how much loyalty you feel to the company and your co-workers. You do NOT have to go to work on your days off. You're not paying drug debts, you're not nursing a crack baby, you do NOT need the money that badly (and didn't they put you on salary?). They are NOT going to fire you for taking some sick leave, and if they do you have documentation (right?) of all the days you filled in for others who were sick.

Dearest. Working extra under normal conditions is one thing. Working yourself to illness and past is QUITE another. You are not well. You should not be working, you do not need to be working, you deserve to not work. I love you, I love you, I want you to be happy and well. Please, darling one, take a couple of days completely off of work and get well before you go back in and tell them to fuck off. You are not putting them under any undue stress; if you are, it is THEIR FAULT by expecting you to go above and beyond what anyone else is prepared to do. You are not fucking them over, you are being a normal person taking care of your normal self.

You want me to call them pretending to be the ER nurse? I'll do it, I swear I will. "Hello, is this Sara's place of business? She gave us this as a secondary contact number, I was wondering if I could explain to her boss that she SHOULD NOT BE AT WORK for the rest of the week, yeah, thanks, I'll hold."

This sounded angry and mean, I'm sorry. I'm not trying to be angry and mean at you, just at your stupid work people who obviously don't appreciate and love you like they should. I love you, I love you, I want you to feel better. And your work is stupid.

It didn't sound angry and mean. I knew what you meant, and it makes perfect sense. Well, kinda. I mean, it does. Chris was basically telling me the exact same thing. Trying to talk me out of working because I needed to stay home and lie down and rest.

But you're talking to the person who feels guilty for being five minutes late.

I don't know. I know I need to take the time off, but I just feel so damn bad about it.

You're sick! You have every right to stay home and get better! They should NOT treat you like that. You deserve to be able to get better....seriously. Go home.

I hope it's not too late to chime in 'Stay home and burn the place down' vote, but I am. You my dear, are sick. Stay home until you feel better, then go back to work and if your conscience demands you make up for it somehow, then work a little extra time.

When you feel better.

*hugs*